Sunday, March 23, 2008

Filmy....So Fucking Filmy....

"It seemed just like something out of a movie.... You know....
Those old cliched deathbed scenes....
She made me hold her hands...And make a promise....
On her.... On my memories of her...
I guess being brought up in a world so centered around the world of films the lines between reality and make believe grow dim....
Filmy..
So Fucking Filmy...


So I held her hand...
And I made the promise...
I had no other choice did I...
I mean She was dying....And well....
It was her last wish....I had to.....
So I played my role... An actor in this macabre scene...
Filmy....
So fucking filmy...


I think sometimes that this may all be some cosmic joke...
The timing of this bad news and time....
All governed by some unknown force...
Just when things seem great...
I've got my job... Things seem to be becoming stable for the family...
Happiness creeping back into our lives....
The tragedy strikes...
Filmy....
So Fucking filmy...


And the promise I made?
The sacred vow I made on her deathbed to keep?
Was it a fading light's last attempt to do some good??
Or was it maybe a promise to look after those who were left behind??
No....Nothing of that sort....That'd be too normal...
No....It had to be over the top....It had to be this...
A vow "To reveal the hidden truth at last"!!!
A vow "to unveil the dark secrets kept hidden so long".....
Had to be so didn't it???
Filmy....
So fucking filmy...


Even after she passes away I'm not overtaken by grief...
I mean i feel the loss....But it doesn't over take me....
I am sad....But I don't feel the need to cry and lament....
But even so...
I can't stop the tears rolling down my face....
I can't stop my self from screaming at her funeral...
I can't stop the self pity and cries I don't really feel...
I'm just a player now....Like an actor in another scene....
Filmy...
So Fucking filmy...


A quest for revenge and justice...
Well at this point I guess it's mandatory for it to follow...
The villain must be sought out....
Misdeeds and wrongs righted....
Sigh..
I'm tired...
All I really want to do is get on with my life...
But...I don't have a choice do I....
So...I will fight...And I guess...
I will win...
Filmy....
So Fucking Filmy.... "

*Click*
*beep*

|| Stopped||
||Play back will resume from this point when played||

To be continued.....

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Filmy isn't it...
So Fucking filmy....

2 comments:

Aadil said...

This particular post of yours - filmy! so f***in filmy! :-)

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